Thursday, February 11, 2010
I am completely wowed (if that is a real word) by the God I serve and how quickly he restores us. I am amazed at how fast he has been restoring my soul from the dryness I was in. He truely has pulled me out of the pit that I was in and placed me on higher ground. Just a month ago I was still feeling down. Life had changed so much for us over the past few months and I was still adjusting. My heart was hard because it had been broken and I was afraid to let anyone else back in. I hurt having to uproot and leave my community, close the doors of our church and move back home. I had some painful breakups of letting some friendship go and it left me jaded. I went to church going through the motions. I did not want to let anyone in to hurt me again. I thought there was no one at this church I could relate to and I was afraid to try. I had my family, friends from the church I grew up in and friends from highschool. They had been with me through thick and thin and proven themselves. I thought that was all I needed. But, I am a relational person and the lack of connection was effecting my worship. My attitude was getting worse and I did not want to serve and frankly I did not want to be there anymore. Not good. I prayed through it and waited. I made myself keep going and tried to serve with a smile on my face. There were Sundays that it was almost painful because inside I was so hurt and out of my comfort zone. Which if you know me, being anywhere with people energizes and excites me. I can't tell you what happened except God would not release me to leave and made me be obedient to keep going.
I found myself wanting to serve again. Two weeks ago we did a glamourshot night for the ladies of the church for Valentine's. I did all of the makeup. As I was doing each face it gave me a chance to talk with each lady. It was so much fun to make them feel beautiful and my heart melted for each one as I got to know them while they were in my chair. Then last week I was my birthday. Darin took me to lunch but had to work the night of my birthday. My sister-in-laws and group of friends all had to work so I called some of the ladies from church. That night as we sat at Carino's for my birthday I realized I have an entire group of new friends. I feel so blessed to feel such a deep connection with the ladies of my church so quickly.
Then Friday night I got to go out with my group of girlfriends that I grew up with. I love these gals. I love that Jenny, my sister-in-law, is one of my very best friends and we share the same birthday week. She knows me so well and got me the Twilight Woods Bath and Bodyworks set for my birthday. She knows I love Twilight and it was so fun to open that gift up. I love that Stephanie my other sister-in-law and I are getting closer since I moved back to the area. What is funny is she got me the same set from Bath and Body Works. They really know me! I had so many facebook messages for my birthday, emails, texts, cards and phone calls last Thursday. My cup was so full it was running over. My love language is words of affirmation and wow, I felt so loved. I am thankful for my grandparents. I got a call from each of them on my birthday. I was born at around 9:00 pm on a Friday night. (They were watching Dallas in the waiting room the night I was born.) Every year on my birthday at 9:00 I get a phone call from my grandparents singing Happy Birthday to me. It is not my birthday until I get that phone call.
Satan is a liar and wants us to feel unloved, isolated and alone. We are not alone. God is always with us and he uses his people to love us. If you are feeling alone don't give up. Don't pull away. Keep reaching up to God and the people around us.