Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Feeling Old

I thought 30 was old until I got there. I thought being married for over 10 years sounded old until I reached that mile stone. I thought being the minivan (although I love my Explorer) driving baseball mom (because my kids don't play soccer) of three sounded old until I brought baby number three home. Now I am taking one to dance and one to baseball. Next year we will be going three different directions. When Dalton turned five it was a milestone but he was still my baby boy. But being a mom of a 7 year old boy is pushing it. 7 sounds so old! I remember being 7 years old. I had a magic show birthday party. Bethany and Heather do you remember that? In my mind I am a skinny 18 year old with adult responsibilities. (In my mind I am still wearing size 3 Rocky Mountain jeans too.) What is also hard to swallow is remember when my mom was my age. Then sounding like her when I say things is hard to take in. But lately life is passing too fast. In May my baby will turn 2 and then there will be no more babies in my house. I once told Darin I would never was to do permanent birth control, and that I always wanted the option of having as many children as I wanted. My mother always regretted not having another and I could not see myself feeling like I would never have another baby. Then I had three! Yea, I knew I was done when I got pregnant with her. Yesterday I went to the hospital to see my friends baby and when I held her I thought it would make me want another one. NOPE! She is a pretty bundle of little girl, but I gladly handed her back and went home to my almost potty trained baby girl. My handsome husband will be 35 this year. In five years I will be married to a 40 year old! Although he does not look a day over 30. Wasn't it yesterday that he was my college beau of 21? To top it all off my little Brighton is 4 going 13! She asked me the other day, when can I be in Mary Kay with you and go to your meetings? I told her when she is 18 I will sign her up and take her with me. She looked at me with her twinkling blue eyes and said, "How 'bout when I'm five." Brighton thinks the world is going to drastically change for her when she's five. She thinks when she is five she is also going to get to start wearing make up and get to spend the night with her friends. Then yesterday she asked me, "When can I drive?"
Today looking at the trashed toy room I will try to cherish these days while I pick up the pile of dumped over mountain of crayons for the 100th time this week.


Foursons said...

Ummmm...Darin doesn't look a day over 30? I think that's stretching it a bit! Try 17... (no offense Darin, when we're all in our 50's and 60's we'll be so jealous of your youthful appearance!)

And hey...I'm married to man more than 40- there's no shame in that! When he's 40 your youngest will be 7, the age you're freaking out about now! And Dalton will be pushing towards teenage years! So really, 40 is OK!

Nocona said...

Yea he is my Carisle

Heather said...

I vaguly remember the magic party. Though the most vivid is the Cabbage Patch that we had different frames and your mom took pictures of us to put in them and the frame shapes were used for a game! Ok, you think 7 is old, try having an 11 year old! Ha ha! Now here's something else to think about....we graduates 14 years ago! Really makes you wonder how the years go by so fast now, but not when we were kids!