Monday, February 2, 2009


I have been in a funk for a week and it is getting old. I could blame it on a lot of things but none of them are a good enough reason for this blue mood. Mary Kay is going very well for me these days and Darin and I could not be better personally. I have left the church in Gods hands and my kids are my kids. Everyone has been sick in the house this last week. Dalton came down with strep last Wed. and the girls had a tummy virus. Thursday night I came down with strep and was stuck in bed. Darin was so sweet and took care of all of us. He gave me my Valentine's present early, The Box Set of Twilight, to cheer me up. He also brought me Ben & Jerry's ice cream to sooth my throat. So when I came down stairs for the first time on Saturday morning, since Thursday and saw the state of things I tried to remind myself of how wonderful he was to me. The filthy kitchen, toys all over the living room, and the mess all over the house was staring me in the face and all I could do was breath and remind myself of all that he has done for me....The dirty house did nothing to help my mood and I just began to pray. I know that being a highly Sanguine personality Satan can attack me best in my emotions and so I was trying my best to not give myself over to them. I just kept trying to take deep breaths and be realistic about all the wonderful things I have in my life. I just tried to start listing them to myself. We must appear to God like spoiled children. Like when Dalton comes to me and says, "Mom I am bored, there's nothing to do!" and he has a room full of toys and video games ect. I go to God and say "I am sad. I don't feel very blessed today." So I decided to list to myself how blessed I really am. So here is my list I came up with.
1. My family that is usually healthy and not sick
2. A wonderful servant hearted husband and who still makes my heart flutter
3. A husband who gets me completely and when he doesn't he tries to understand
4. A little boy that is so personable with people and is self assured
5. A beautiful little girl who is exactly like I pictured she would be and look like who wants to be just like me and tells everyone she is my best friend
6. Not one but two little girls. I always wanted a girl and was so worried I would not get one and got gave me two blue eyed little girls
7. A Sweet spirited little girl who loves to cuddle
8. A best friend. I finally have a best friend that calls me hers too. I get to ramble to her everyday and never worry about her getting tired of me or judging me.
9. Getting to live in New Braunfels Texas. I mean I have lived all over Texas following Darin's ministry and I get to live in New Braunfels Texas. If I could have put my finger on a map of Texas and tell God where I wanted to live this is where it would be and we are here. (We are not in Brackettville ANYMORE!)
10. My legacy in Christ. Being raised in a home where Christ was part of our lives and church was a priority. Getting to be a part of the Youth Ministry at MBC and still being close to the kids I grew up with. Our youth group was special and unique.
11. My family. My brothers who are still close to me and their wives. My parents who are the best grandparents ever to my kids.
12. A grandpa that would get not one but two cars because he knew I needed it. I mean this Thanksgivings when he drove up in my parents driveway with a white Explorer in great condition that he bought for me, then wrote me a check for the insurance for a year. How can I not feel blessed every time I drive that car.
13. A company like Mary Kay that I love and get to win a pink car. It provides a place for me to grow and be encouraged. A place where I am just Nocona. Not someones mom and not a pastor's wife but just Nocona.
14. I have great friends to do life with. I have wonderful ladies in Mary Kay that are so encouraging and fun. My birthday girls that I get to share my birthday month with and throw fun parties with. My friends that are other moms that I can vent to and get advice from.
Jenny Childress is the constant encourager and fun person.
Jenny Helm I have already blogged about.
Jill has the sweetest laugh.
Stephanie and her sweet calm spirit and giving heart.
Julie I have already talked about and mentioned.
Angie is the sweetest fun person and my spirit is lifted just getting to talk to her.
Megan has the sweetest most giving heart of anyone I know.
Becca is the wisest person that fills my life with her giving heart and grace that overflows out of her.
15. Last but not least my heavenly father. A God who is my life and my love. Who makes me more and makes me better. I don't know how people live life with out the strength and peace of the faith we have in Jesus Christ.

Then as I was listing all of these things in my head I heard my new favorite song on the radio and it was like God was speaking to me right there in the car.
Why are you striving these days?
Why are you trying to earn grace?
Why are you crying?
Let me lift up your face Just don't turn away
Why are you looking for love?
Why are you still searching? As if I'm not enough?
To where will you go child, Tell me where will you run? To where will you run?
Chorus:Cause I'll be by your side wherever you fall In the dead of night whenever you call Please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you Look at these hands, at my side
They swallowed the grave, on that night When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in And give you life
Chorus:Here at my side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
Please don't fight these hands that are holding you My hands are holding you
And I, I love you And I want you to know That I, I'll love you


Journey thru the Hills said...

You are so precious! Wise? Hardly, sweet girl! You are the one that is wise! I just love hanging out with you and we need to do it ALOT more! Our husbands need to hang out too :) Love you and Happy Birthday to one of the MOST beautiful people I know inside and out!!!!

jennydiane said...

I loved reading your list and I want you to know that YOU encourage me all of the time! I am inspired by you and energized by you every single time I am around out and each time I read your blog! I hope you had a wonderful birthday!!!!! LOVE YOU!